Being Geek Chic is a blog about one woman navigating the male-dominated industries of production and tech. It's written by Elizabeth Giorgi, Founder, CEO and Director of Mighteor - one of the world's first internet video production companies. Learn more about Mighteor here.
Fact: I write about my life. I’m not an open book. But I’m definitely a mildly opaque one. And sometimes, mining my life for content, actually works out pretty damn well for me.
At least it did last week.
On Thursday, I got some really big, totally huge news. The screenplay I wrote while in Italy last summer was selected as a finalist for Seattle International Film Festival’s first Catalyst Screenwriting Competition. It’s exciting for a number of rather huge reasons: first, it was an artistic validation unlike anything I had ever experienced before. Second, it feels like the crazy chance I took diving into writing for a few weeks and stepping away from my business was actually worth it.
When you run a small business, even a creative one, taking a vacation can seem like an absurd luxury. And while I want to go into the reasons why it’s imperative that even new #girlbosses step away from their work and relax once in a while, I’ll save that for another day. Instead, I want to focus on that bit about validation.
The script, Private Parts, is about modern dating in the age of sharing digital nudes before we even know someone’s middle name. It’s a portrait of contemporary intimacy, if you will. And inside that script are about four different men that I dated in the last year before meeting my current beau, R. Of course their names were all changed, but their role in my life and the way that I saw them as people is all there. And while I could feel guilty about including their stories and their qualities with the world, I don’t. And to be honest, I refuse to. Because here’s the thing: I don’t hide what I do. And what I do, is create.
Recently, I asked R: “How would you feel if I wrote about you?” His answer was simple: “Just don’t do it on the blog.” Who knows what is in our future, but already I know where our story begins. And that’s what I love most about my life right now. For the first time, I feel like I understand why we keep doing this even when we don’t get validation from the powers that be. It’s because I don’t know how to live my life any other way. I don’t even know how to date without knowing that I will probably need to write about it later.
The big heartbreaks? Catalogued in history in ways that are implicit and subtle. The strange sexual interactions? Remembered forever through various characters whose names all start with the letter E. The bizarre encounters between humans just trying to figure it out? Still being worked out privately in Final Draft. One particular ex is everywhere. He’s in Private Parts. He’s in my upcoming short film, Victoriana. And I could feel bad, but that’s what you get for cheating.
But here’s what is so surprising: the artistic validation feels so much more powerul than the closure I received from processing that experience through my writing. I never want to be cheated on again, but I’ll tell you this: I am weirdly delighted that it happened. The source material has provided immeasurable motivation. Just ask Beyonce.
I started this blog when I still felt like a girl. It was five years ago and despite having a lot of grown up things: a respectable job, a handsome grown man for a partner, a regularly operational vehicle and a healthy collection of high heels. For some baffling reason, I had this vision in my mind that one day I would feel like the woman in Weird Science, who somehow oozes femininity and strength and self-awareness without fear. It was only in the last year or so that I realized that being a woman wasn’t a feeling or an age or an object or even an identifiable trait. It is a decision.
Here’s what I mean. Being a girl is just about the hardest thing a living creature can be on the planet. Short of an endangered species or a blade of grass, the dangers to your life and your soul are constant. You’re constantly being projected on by the world. Rarely do we hear messages that say: “You! You get to decide who you are. You get to decide what happens to you.” This is especially prevalent in other places in the world, but it’s present here in subversive, sick ways that are hard to ignore or forget.
There are literally thousands of ways we could break this down: rape culture, misogyny, unequal pay, the impossible beauty standards, the Welfare system - pick a problem and it doesn’t matter how old you are - the little girl you were at 6 or 11 or 14 was standing in a minefield of dangerous emotional time bombs before she even got her period.
And so feeling “grown up” is impossible. By the time you are objectively old enough to be considered a woman, you’re so beaten down by the world’s expectations that you almost don’t want to be one. At least, that’s what happened to me. Until I started to redefine what being a woman meant to me.
So I started compiling a list of quotes that remind me that being a woman is a choice we make every day. It’s sort of like how Olivia Pope wakes up every morning and chooses to be a warrior. Same idea. Wake up tomorrow and say to yourself: I am a woman. I choose this. And it’s happening on my terms.
“I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay.” - Madonna
“The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.” - Roseanne Barr
“We still think of a powerful man as a born leader and a powerful woman as an anomaly.” - Margaret Atwood
“Bitches get stuff done.” - Tina Fey
“Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, “She doesn’t have what it takes.” They will say, “Women don’t have what it takes.” - Clare Boothe Luce
“People think at the end of the day that a man is the only answer [to fulfillment]. Actually a job is better for me.” - Princess Diana
“I’ve yet to be on a campus where most women weren’t worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I’ve yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing.” - Gloria Steinem
“I can’t think of any better representation of beauty than someone who is unafraid to be herself.” - Emma Stone
“When you love and accept yourself, when you know who really cares about you, and when you learn from your mistakes, then you stop caring about what people who don’t know you think.” - Beyonce
““What’s the worst possible thing you can call a woman? Don’t hold back, now.
You’re probably thinking of words like slut, whore, bitch, cunt (I told you not to hold back!), skank. Okay, now, what are the worst things you can call a guy? Fag, girl, bitch, pussy. I’ve even heard the term “mangina.” Notice anything? The worst thing you can call a girl is a girl. The worst thing you can call a guy is a girl. Being a woman is the ultimate insult. Now tell me that’s not royally fucked up.” - Jessica Valenti
I’m having a girls weekend this weekend and I’m jazzed. It’s long overdue and probably more likely to be filled with cocktails than serious fashion, but a girl can build up the anticipation of the whole deal by planning out her tee shirt wearing routine a little more aggressively than the usual person.
There is no doubt in my mind that there will be sparkly skirts and high heel shoes, but there’s nothing more epic than a woman that can rock a tank or a tee with a bit of sequins. That’s how I do around here.
So, here’s what I’ve got on tap:
Thou Shalt Get Her Own Money Tee (Tees in the Trap): $30
Margot by Nan Lawson (Society 6): $22
Epic Weekend Tank (Target): $12.99
Here’s hoping you have an epic weekend that is less dramatic than Margot Tenenbaum’s lifestyle, but seriously Beyonce-esque and paid for your with your own damn money.
It’s no mystery that I love Beyonce. I admire her. I respect her. I want to dance like her. There’s nothing she can’t do. Her songs fill up my playlists, but her life mottos are always in my head. That’s why I made these free printables for you, in hopes that her philosophy can help you get through every day.
You need both prints, which are 8 inches by 10 inches, but let’s start with part 1. DOWNLOAD WHO RUN THE WORLD PART 1 HERE.
DOWNLOAD GIRLS RUN THE WORLD PART 2 HERE.
I’ll admit that there’s nothing nerdy about Queen Bey, but if there’s any idea I can get behind, it’s the idea that all women need to have more confidence and power and bravery. So whatever other labels may swirl around us… please remember we have the power to run the world.
